TV Shows We'd Like To See  (01/23/2012)

Why can't the Major TV Networks come up with original show ideas?

Please, let's be real: We weren't that crazy about the movie 'Napolean Dynamite' the FIRST time, so now they're going to make an animated series of that bomb? Excuse me? And do we really REALLY need to see yet another version of '90210' - didn't we suffer enough the LAST time that show was on the air?

To be sure, there are SOME original concepts out there. I can name a few that I'm fond of, such as ABC's 'Once Upon A Time', 'Alcatraz', 'Fringe' (though even that one is more like the 'X-Files' with a less rational cast, most days), and a few others. But you have to admit: How many different VERSIONS of 'CSI' do we need to see?

What's next: 'CSI Poughkeepsie'???

I know the economy's in the tank, and possibly for good, this time. I know money is tight. But surely SOME of those idiots in New York and Hollywood can think up a FEW low budget but original story ideas for new television series? I'd like to think that nearly anyone with half a brain and a trained eye towards their own past history could come up with a FEW novel ideas.

So let's put that theory to the test, shall we? The following are a few potential TV Series ideas that I've come up with, based on my own recent misadventures in daily life. Some of them I've twisted just enough to make them more interesting. Some of them were twisted enough already. Let's see what we come up with, shall we?

MIS-MANAGEMENT

Okay, so 'Undercover Boss' was an original idea but I don't believe it went far enough. With this show, we replace the ENTIRE management crew with the grunts from the trenchs. That's right: we move MANAGEMENT into production, and the PRODUCTION WORKERS into management in one select company, every week. Let's see if those yahoos in suits can figure out how to locate an orphaned class instance, or develop a rational and feasible software interface window in less than four hour's time. On the other hand, it might also be mildly amusing to see how the normal production workers handle themselves in an executive-level client design meeting for about eight interrupted hours, with no bathroom/smoke/cellphone breaks and without a handy dandy copy of 'facebook' or 'google' running on a nearby laptop...

At the end of each episode, the production workers acting as Management hold an executive level conference room meeting and vote amongst themselves as to wich management employee working as 'Production' will be fired. The person given the pink slip finds themselves unemployed in real life, as well....

SHORT PEOPLE

With this fictional story, the American Basketball Federation (ABF) is quickly approaching bankruptcy and the league needs a major shake-up to attract public interest and promote ticket sales. With this goal in mind, a middle-aged dumpy woman named 'Eartha MacGavin', a tubby and quite tiny widower with two adult sons, is approached by the league and offered big bucks to become the coach of the 'Jacksonville Juggernauts', one of the league's most successful franchises. The problem? Ms. MacGavin, grumpy to a fault and with all the public social skills of a troll in heat, stands all of about four foot eight, and her hefty multi-million dollar contract is contigent on two conditions: She can ONLY recruit players who are under five foot six inches in height, and her team must finish with a winning percentage over fifty percent or her entire salary for the season will be null and void.

Of course, the 'Juggernauts' are the ONLY team in the league with this restriction; every other team is jam-packed with the usual professional basketball seven foot, two-hundred twenty pound behemoths. To make matters worse, Ms. MacGiven becomes quickly enamored of the league's most valuable player, Jasper Jenkins (Played possibly by Lebron James) and her attraction to the opposing player interferes with her team's rigid but short-winded training regiman on a regular basis....

TOO MUCH TO LOSE

The premise of this season long game show is simple: Eight of the world's most gorgeous, slim, and exquisitely sexy super models are given a unique challenge in order to win a ten million dollar prize: they must all be sequestered to a ramshackle restaurant located somewhere in Louisiana for the entire season and gain as much WEIGHT as possible. At the end of each show, there will be a weigh in performed using standard bathroom scales purchased from Walmart: The first model to cause the scale to malfunction during the weigh-in will be awarded the grand prize and be given free liposuction for a year...

They are coached in this endeavour by some of the world's most successful and slightly pudgy cooks: Rachel Ray comes immediately to mind, in this regard...

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